The football offseason is the time of year when people all
start contemplating rule changes in hopes of improving their league.
We like to think we are all a stable bunch and would like to tinker
with the rules each year to make our leagues perfect. But everyone
knows most fantasy people are a little whacked. So it goes without
explanation that some rule proposals are beyond words. In my many
years of playing fantasy football, I have come to see a wide range
of rule proposals. I will not pass judgement here, but shall offer
these as possibilities to sprucing up your 8 year league that is
getting a little stale.
Listed in no particular order:
1. Progressive Loss Tax - Each loss incurs a higher fine.
For example; 1st loss = 25cents, 2nd loss = 50 cents and so on.
This may not sound like a big deal, but can add a little excitement
when the guy who did not prep for the draft starts 0-7 and is facing
a $32 payment should his team not eat their Wheaties and break out
of their slump. It is for this reason (unless you are Donald Trump)
that you may want to create a maximum fine per loss should you adopt
this rule.
2. Everyone Must Play (also known as the Little League Rule)
- Everyone that gets drafted must play by a certain week in the
season or that player must be cut from your roster. This is especially
a cool rule when applied to Keeper Leagues who have a lot of rookies
that are sitting the pine.
3. Performance of the Week Bonuses - Award bonuses for the
longest pass, longest rush, longest reception and longest field
goal. This can make Monday Night Football a real nail biter (especially
if you are counting on the extra points that you think you have).
Oh No is a popular MNF phrase if this rule gets adopted.
4. Player Misconduct Fines - Your player wants to solicit
13 year olds, add to the kitty. Your player thinks groping that
nice waitress is acceptable, add to the kitty. Your player is caught
hiding in a car trunk, add to the kitty. You get the theme. Your
little way to ensure that these thugs are not popular in your league.
Heaven knows the NFL is doing little to curb this recent tide.
5. Wins Count Double for Points over 100 - If you adopt such
a rule, make the target very hard to reach. It is OK if no-one reaches
it. This rule helps keep everyone motivated near the midseason mark.
Yes Bob you are 1-7, but if you can just score 100 points each week,
you will make the playoffs. For true sadists, deduct two losses
for the unfortunate sucker who played the hot team.
6. Lose a Roster Spot (and Player) Per Loss - I only know
of one league that was crazy enough to play this and they only did
it for one season. Adopted from the movie Rollerball, the final
rosters were a tad thin for the Championship game. If you are crazy
enough to add this to your rules, you may want to draft a little
deeper than usual.
7. Worst Score Hosts Monday Night Football Party The Following
Week - This can be a rule that really tests a marriage as the
beer belchers arrive three weeks in a row. It is also a good motivator
to come to the draft prepared.
8. Popular Player Fine - If a player appears on Sports Illustrated
or similar named magazines, a fine is levied. And of course this
is extremely enjoyable when the entire defense (provided you didn't
draft it) is featured on the cover.
9. New Owner Initiation - Sky is the limit on what you can
require of new owners. For a tame league, pizza and beverages is
appropriate. For the league that wants to adopt most of the rules
contained in this article, feel free to mail me a video tape.
10. Oops He is on a Bye Week - Every year an owner or two
plays someone that is on his bye week. Make him drop that player
the following week and it will likely never happen again.
11. Punishment for Drafting Someone on Injured Reserve -
Make the owner change his name to include the player drafted. It
can be slightly embarassing to announce that the Chattanooga Jamal
Anderson's are at home this week.
12. A Day at the Races - The winner of the league must bet
all of the winnings on one horse. Very intense as everyone in the
league is rooting against the league winner. Beyond intense when
the favorite needs to show and is a distant 4th.
13. Automatic Win for Predicting Your Score - Must predict
a score over 30 points. This is quite the treat when you are down
68-31, but win on this fluke. This rule was adopted for the bad
pinball player that gets a free game by matching. This rule is even
more fun when coupled with the drop a player per loss above.
14. Bonus Points for Playing Injured Guys - 1 bonus point
awarded for each person appearing as questionable on the injury
report. 2 points awarded for each person listed as doubtful/out.
Points are only awarded if the player takes the field.
Don't think for a moment that this is a complete list. There is
no limit to bizarre rules and if they result in your league having
fun then they have accomplished their objective.
