LaDainian Tomlinson (26 PaYd, 192 RuYd, 6-28 ReYd, 1 PaTD, 3 RuTD) – Now that is a stat line! Wow! Talk about jack of all trades. You think the Chargers have figured out to get LaDainian Tomlinson more involved in the offense? Head coach Marty: “Gee Cam, we’re 0-2 and our best player hasn’t caught a pass yet and doesn’t have 20 carries in a game.” OC Cam Cameron: “Darren Sproles caught a pass last week.” Coach Marty: “Not Sproles you fool! Tomlinson! LaDainian Tomlinson!” Coach Cam: “Oh right... , him. But what about Sproles? He’s nifty. See how short he is?” Coach Marty: “Yes, yes, I know. Just get LT more involved, okay?” Coach Cam: “Okay Marty. Gee, you seem kind of stressed. Its like your job is riding on this or something...” Coach Marty: “Grr...”

Steve Smith (11-170 ReYd, 3 TD) – Did I say not long ago Steve Smith could very well step in and post numbers comparable with Mushin Muhammad a year ago, when Muhammad finished as the #1 WR in fantasy football? Well, if I didn’t say it I was thinking it. Honest.

Shaun Alexander (140 RuYd, 4 TD) - Boy are the Cardinals in horrible shape. And considering we are talking about the Cardinals, that really is saying something. And as poorly as the Cards play at home, they take that to a whole new dismal level on the road. And lo and behold, TD machine Shaun Alexander was there to reap the benefits.

You know, typically the Groin Shot Candidates are more middle tier players who were borderline start-bench decisions for your opponent that really were not expected to kick you as hard as they did. Guys like Joey Galloway, Travis Taylor and Fred Taylor would have been nice picks this week. But I just can’t ignore 3, 4 and 4 TD performances whether from a stud player or not. That just isn’t fair.

Comments From The Couch

• I was the width of my pinky finger close to drafting Brian Westbrook way above his average draft position at the 5th overall pick in a point per reception league. Ultimately I decided to hope the other owners were napping and take a chance he lasts until my second round pick. He went 2 picks before that 2nd rounder. Damn. He is worth the 5th overall. And then some.
  
  
• Jim Nantz mentioned during the Pats-Steelers broadcast that there are now 17 million people playing fantasy football. To which Phil Simms replied something to the effect, "why would I care what they think?" Note to Phil: If CBS had to make a choice between you and its CBS Sportsline Commissioner product, they would tell you to hit the bricks faster than that snowball hit you back in the memorable Pats-Raiders tuck rule playoff game. I still chuckle about that one.
  
  
• You can tell scoring was down last week because we ended up with what seemed like 2 weeks worth of TD celebrations this week. I'm not a fan of the Steve Smith pose. Chad Johnson's Riverdance was clever and funny. You'd think Daunte Culpepper would come up with some new material after a miserable first 2 weeks.
  
  
• Saw my first trailer for the movie Doom during the Bucs-Packers game. Movies based on video games, particularly video games with no story to begin with, never work.
  
  
• Heroic effort by David Akers kicking the game winning FG with a bad - apparently very bad - hamstring injury. Even with the win though, one would certainly think the Eagles should have deactivated Akers for a one game fill-in at kicker. Off Philly kickoffs the Raiders started at the 50, their own 39, their own 39 and their own 41, scoring 13 of their 20 points on those drives. Well, the Eagles will certainly need a minimum one game fill-in kicker starting this week.
  
  
• Chad Pennington is out for the year with a torn rotator cuff. This coupled with a serious shoulder injury to Jay Fiedler, who isn't as bad as you think, might have just sunk the Jets fans high hopes so the next best thing they have to look forward to is the NFL Draft. Could a Patrick Ramsey to Laveranues Coles reunion be on the horizon?
  
  
• News update: Nope, looks like Vinny Testaverde is making a return trip to the Big Apple.
  
  
• Kick returns are cool to watch, or at least I thought they used to be. This weekend I began to wonder why bother. As a conservative estimate, I'd say 90% of the kickoff returns I watched were called back due to a penalty. Team scores... Commercial break... Kickoff and penalty nullifying return... Commercial break... Resume normal play. Tack that up as reason # 27 for watching the games on delay.
  
  
• Fantasy owners who use individual defensive players are scrambling this week with the losses of Rodney Harrison and Takeo Spikes to season ending injuries. It isn't normal that the loss of a single player greatly effects the team defense fantasy rankings, but it does in both of these cases.
  
  
• Whoa. Larry Allen just went right after Jose Cortez after a missed extra point on the first Cowboy TD. Although it wasn't Cortez's fault (Allen didn't know this), I'm surprised he didn't wet himself with that behemoth bearing down on him.
  
  
• Did the Dallas secondary learn nothing from Santana Moss burning by them Monday night? Apparently not. "Weak-armed" Tim Rattay just burned them on an 89-yard TD to Brandon Lloyd. Sideline commentator Tony Siragusa just relayed a quote from Cowboys safety Roy Williams that the, "49ers don't have a deep game." Apparently everyone should insert some deep play calls on these clowns.
  
  
• Colts head coach Tony Dungy signed a contract extension at the start of the season, marking the timeline where he fully and completely Dungy-fied the Colts. Peyton Manning has 2 TD through 3 games, and zero, zilch, nada through the past 2. The Titans, 49ers and Rams are their next 3 opponents. If he doesn't light it up by then, well... Well, I don't know what other than to suggest Eli starts getting consideration for your starting lineup over Peyton.
  
  
• Cadillac Williams set a rookie record for rushing yards in his first 3 games to start his NFL career, with 434 passing Alan Ameche's record of 410 from 1955! He has done that on 88 carries which is more than one-third of the carries he had through 13 games last year at Auburn (239 for 1,165 yards, 12 TD by the way). There was a comment during this game indicating Jon Gruden felt Cadillac is one of the best conditioned athletes he's seen. Cadillac had better be. He'd better be...
  
  
• Although they continue to be the target of much criticism, I haven't mentioned the ESPN Sunday night crew at all this year because frankly, we've flogged that horse time and again the last few years. It gets boring. However I will say this: Joe Theismann's continuous use of phrases like "ticky-tack" and "unflappable" grate on me like nails on a chalk board.
  
  
• Robert Ferguson should continue to put up good numbers this year in Javon Walker's absence, but from where I'm sitting he really doesn't show the skill that you would normally associate with the numbers I expect him to get. All the Brett Favre haters out there can take that to the bank as something Favre is still good for, making productive fantasy receivers where none existed before.
  
  
• Do the Vikings have a starter at RB we can trust will be the starter at RB in Mewelde Moore? This situation will always be a week-to-week roll of the dice as long as Mike Tice is coaching them.
  
  
• The one thing I've found since writing FF In The Groin is I really don't have a good handle on how many people are reading it every week. So occasionally I like to throw out a softball which is sure to spurn a big response in my email. That said, we'd like to pay tribute to the following players seen working the phones at the hurricane relief telethon a week ago as witnessed by FFITG readers: Dhani Jones (with bow tie), Brian Dawkins, Chad Pennington, Jay Fiedler, Kevin Mawae and Wayne Chrebet. Jim mentioned he saw Cedric Benson. Or perhaps he talked to him. I'd be surprised if Cedric Benson was there given the travel involved, but props to him if he was there too.
  
  
• I have a Jim Kelly jersey and a Drew Bledsoe jersey. Both of these were gifts as I would have preferred a Bruce Smith and a Willis McGahee at the time those were purchased. Anyway, if my next birthday results in a new J.P. Losman jersey, I'm going to slip a "t" in there between the "s" and the "m". J.P. is just Lost, Man.

And The Winner Is…

Anyone have their game completely wrapped up this week heading into Sunday night, facing “only” Tomlinson? Hmm... ? Never count the chickens before they’ve hatched and never, ever notch a win in the fantasy football column until all the games are done. Especially if you are facing LT. This guy will be mentioned in the same vein as Emmitt Smith and Walter Payton someday. I truly believe that..