Groin Shot of the Week Candidates

Daunte Culpepper (425 PaYd, 5 TD) - Haven't I talked about this guy enough yet? This has gone past ridiculous and right into absurd. He's on pace for over 60 TD! He's on pace for over 5,600 passing yards! He just had his third 5 TD game and not just his fourth 300+ yard game, but third 350+ yard game. He's already won the Groin award twice this year. Amongst all QBs he's ranked by week (excluding his bye week 4) 1st, 3rd, 4th, 1st, and although we still have Marc Bulger versus Brian Griese tonight, I'm going to go out on a limb and say, 1st again this week in fantasy scoring. For those of us who would never consider drafting a QB in the first round, back to ye ole drawing board.

Reuben Droughns (176 RuYd, 1 TD) - We've been down this road before, correct? Not only did Culpepper make the list last week and this week, but I don't see many other options to avoid putting Reuben Droughns on the list for a second straight week. Still some uncertainty by fantasy owners leading up to Sunday with the return of Quentin Griffin from injury. And some Tatum Bell supporters were still lurking around here and there. Remember, Mike Shanahan, as frustrating as he is, will go with the hot hand. Reuben Droughns is super-nova hot right now. 38 carries in Shanahan's biggest "circle" game of the year against the hated Raiders. It would seem Droughns has a pretty strong grip on the starting job... for now... bwahahahaha... (trailing off evil laugh).

Curtis Martin (111 RuYd, 2 TD) - Finally a new name. Well, not "new" but a new name from last week. It's a good thing week 5's third candidate Tiki Barber was on bye this week, because I was getting worried there. The Jets started slow and Martin started slow and the 49ers started hot jumping out to a 14-3 lead at half. The Jets must have had visions of Patriots running through their heads. SLAP! Hey, wake up you fools! Get through this game first! In the final quarter, Martin racked up 62 yards and 2 TD for a Jets win to set up a battle of undefeated teams next week at Foxboro.

Comments From The Couch

• Play William Green? Play Lee Suggs? Thanks to the Bengals, play both of them and rejoice!
  
  
• I love it. Andre' Davis catches a 99 yard TD pass midway through the 1st quarter, and then disappears the rest of the day. Final anagram stat line: 1-99-1.
  
  
• I did think heading into this season Fred Taylor could be setting himself up for a 60-70 catch season which could vault him into top 5 stud RB status. He had 1 reception through his first 3 games. At least someone finally clued in Byron Leftwich that, hey, this guy can do things if we toss him the ball. The 64 yard catch and run puts an exclamation on that point. Make that 13 catches for Taylor in his last 3 games.
  
  
• It is a good thing the Cowboys did NOT score on the final play of the game against the Steelers, because otherwise the games would be overshadowed with debates on when a player is out of bounds and home versus away time keepers. I still sense (or suggest) a reminder memo being distributed from Paul Tagliabue's office this week.
  
  
• I think Bill Parcells was trying to shake up rookie QB Ben Roethlinsberger of the Steelers with the Dan Marino comparison compliment earlier in the week. Didn't work.
  
  
• Although Michael Vick seems to be the unanimous "expert" choice in the endless Vick versus LaDainian Tomlinson debate (which I don't entirely understand why it is that lopsided for a sub-60% passer), Vick is damn frustrating as a fantasy player. It wasn't until the 4th quarter he earned 130 of his 218 passing yards, most of his rushing yards, rushing TD and 1 passing TD. Until he becomes less hit or miss, I won't be drafting him. I don't need that stress.
  
  
• ESPN headline on Dolphins-Bills recap: "McGahee impressive in win over Dolphins". Before we get too excited, McGahee was not actually that impressive until late in the game and thanks to some shoddy Dolphin tackling. In fact, there was little that was impressive in this whole game - offense, defense, coaching. There is a reason these teams are a combined 1-10 right now. I don't care. I'm a Bills fan and we'll take it!
  
  
• Is it any coincidence that two of the worst offenders for dropped passes - Koren Robinson and Donte' Stallworth - both wear visors on their helmets? Great observation by Texansfan on our forums.
  
  
• Thanks to Clinton Portis for, quote, "getting his ass in gear", as requested last week in this column. I didn't know Clinton was a FF In The Groin reader, but Clinton if you're reading this week, drop me a line and I'll set you up with a free subscription to FF Today ;)
  
  
• There have been a lot of mysteries so far this year, but the biggest for me has to be what the heck is wrong with Steve McNair? Better running game, which in theory is supposed to open up the receivers more. It isn't working that way. Four - 4(!) - interceptions!?! Losing Justin McCareins and then Tyrone Calico couldn't make that much difference, could it? I'm baffled at this one.
  
  
• For those who predicted a letdown by the Eagles this week, you realize this was the team, the Panthers, that knocked them out last year, right? This was a slaughter. I was hoping for some Jake Delhomme garbage fantasy points, but the Eagles were merciless.
  
  
• For those who predicted a letdown by the Jets looking ahead to the Pats game next week, you were right but apparently 20:00 minutes of the Jets executing their game plan is better than 60:00 minutes of the 49ers.
  
  
• So how many Kevan Barlow owners benched him this week? Definitely vying for Most Frustrating Fantasy Player Award this season. It might not even be that close a competition.
  
  
• Think strength of schedule doesn't mean anything? The Seahawks gave up 242 yards per game and 13 total points after 3 weeks facing the Saints, Bucs and 49ers. They've now given up 360+ yards each game and 63 points the last 2 weeks facing the Rams and Patriots. This equals out to an average defense, for those tooting Ray Rhodes horn early on.
  
  
• The way the Chiefs stormed into Baltimore as if they were ready to take back control of their season, to come out of the bye week with that effort against the Jaguars is pretty disappointing. Between the Chiefs and watching Carlos Beltran belt homer after homer for the Astros, it can't be a fun time for sports fans in Kansas City right now.
  
  
• Although I'm not a Pats fan, one of the things I respect is they have an uncanny ability to know exactly when to go for the kill shot. On 3rd-and-7 with under 3 minutes remaining, Tom Brady tosses a key 48-yard pass to Bethel Johnson. A thing of beauty. Noteworthy motivational coaching maneuver: Johnson was a healthy scratch the prior week.
  
  
• Of course I'm going to mention the Bills win this week! We've been waiting 6 weeks for this! Thank you Jay Fiedler! Thank you Coach Wanstedt! Thank you Ricky Williams! Woo-hoo!

And The Winner Is…

I can't give it to Culpepper again this week, can I? Nah, it was only the Saints. I think Priest Holmes had this "problem" before in my column. Expectations get so high he can't possibly make the list except as a disappointment. Sorry Daunte. Let's go with the current favorite in the running for fantasy football waiver pickup of the year, Reuben Droughns. Why did the Broncos spend a second round pick on Bell? I'm thinking next year I'll head down to Denver and try out for RB. I've got to be good for a few preseason snaps and a 5.0 average behind that line.